by Annie
| I had the normal 1980s childhood, Alf, The Smurfs, E.T. all of that. However, I did have parents who did not focus much attention on censoring our media viewing and so it goes that not only did I watch Stand by Me as a kid but I watched the hell out of it. In my defense it was recorded on the same VHS tape as the The Goonies so in one glorious afternoon you could watch both cinematic gems. |
At least it was the version recorded off of TV so the language wasn't so bad, for instance during the scene where Eyeball is giving Ace a tattoo in our copy he says, "Quit moving you're gonna make me mess up the snake part," instead of "F*ck up the snake part." See, so that makes watching teens smoke cigarettes, swig booze, and give each other tattoos not so shocking because hey, at least they took out the F word.
If you've never seen Stand by Me you need to, it is a great movie with so many quotable lines that I really had a difficult time holding myself back from just regurgitating every amusing line I could think of into this article. For Example, “You four-eyed pile of shit! A pile of shit has a thousand eyes!”
Based on a story by Stephen King, the plot is centered around four 12 year old boys who embark on a trek on foot through the wilds of Oregon to find the dead body of a missing hiker. They lie to their parents, steal a gun, smoke cigarettes, jump in front of trains, cuss, relentlessly tease each other, almost get stabbed, almost shoot someone... holy crap why did my parents let me watch this!
Not only is there all of the above awesomeness but there is a young pre-Star Trek Wil Wheaton who is so real and believable as Gordie LaChance the smart, talented writer-to-be who is living in constant emotional turmoil because of the death of his older brother.
But wait there's more, there's chubby awkward, nobody-saw-it-coming-that-he-was-going-to-be-hot-one-day Jerry O’Connell as Verne, the kid who just wanted to find that damn jar of pennies he buried under the porch.
There is also River Phoenix as Chris Chambers who perfectly plays the bright, good kid constantly being stereotyped as a thug because of his miscreant older brother Ace.
Also because this is a 1980s movie there is the obligatory Corey, in this movie Corey Feldman plays Teddy the comic relief who also has just enough crazy to train dodge ("Train dodge, dig it, just like the beach at Normandy" sorry I can't help myself I just know so many Stand by Me quotes) and taunt an attack dog with cries of "sick balls Chopper!"
| Oh and ladies there is eye candy, Ace the bad-ass older brother who's character is just an awful human being is played by teenage Kiefer Sutherland who was the subject of many a 1980s Tiger Beat bad boy crush. |
I learned some things from Stand by Me. Like that a plan can seem like harmless fun and then you realize, "we're going to see a dead kid, maybe it shouldn't be a party.' 'Yah! Like what if he's all cut up and blood and shit all over the place! I might get nightmares.'" Also, that revenge can be sought through mass vomiting, "it was a total and complete barf-o-rama." And that if you get hard up for something to write about you can always spin a tale of boyhood adventure which may contain leeches affixed to private parts. But mostly that friendships may be temporary and friends may go their separate ways but the magical memories of finding a dead kid in the woods will last forever.
